After a rather minor operation last Friday morning, I've spent the weekend taking it easy. As you may guess, this means copious amounts of time spent in front of this computer. I got myself a new monitor to mark the occasion, 23" of widescreen goodness. But a period like this, trapped in the house, forces me to regress to a state of dreaming restlessness. I have to plan... to go somewhere, to buy something. To sit and do nothing is not something I am capable of, unless I have accomplished something. I can sit and enjoy the view from the top of a mountain I have climbed, or watch an afternoon film form the comfort of the couch if I've completed a particularly gruelling cycle that morning. Otherwise, what's the point? Life should be lived fully, filled with active engagements!
So these days have been torturous... reorganise my music collection? Done. Tick off those 'to do' lists? Done. Soon I'll find myself sorting out the cabling behind my desk, and labelling each wire and plug. Maybe with a colour-coded system if I'm feeling wild. Hopefully I'll be able to eat properly by Tuesday, and pull myself out of this reverie.
Sunday, 4 October 2009
Sunday, 20 September 2009
Restlessness
Been a while since I felt the need to post here. Been growing up, bit by bit. I have a freakin' pension now! And yet, the most of me still feels like I'm pretending to be an adult.
I'm still living in the same house, sleeping in the same bed. I have no place of my own, no mortgage, no shed. I've never put up a set of shelves, nor laid a carpet. Can't cook, don't cook. No girlfriend, no fiancé, no wife. Haven't left Europe yet, haven't pushed myself out of my comfort zone in any meaningful way. I just sit and make plans. Plans for the next week, for the weekends of the next few months, the five year plan... always planning - putting off 'til tomorrow what I want to do today, but can't afford.
I'm still living in the same house, sleeping in the same bed. I have no place of my own, no mortgage, no shed. I've never put up a set of shelves, nor laid a carpet. Can't cook, don't cook. No girlfriend, no fiancé, no wife. Haven't left Europe yet, haven't pushed myself out of my comfort zone in any meaningful way. I just sit and make plans. Plans for the next week, for the weekends of the next few months, the five year plan... always planning - putting off 'til tomorrow what I want to do today, but can't afford.
Tuesday, 31 March 2009
The Italian
Fkn hell... this has been building up for a while, but dammit, I can't take it anymore.
New guy started about a month and a half ago now. Himself and myself are a team within the company, so we sit beside each other. He seems a really nice guy, but constantly irritates me in so many tiny ways...
* If your phone is vibrating, pick it up off the desk. Better yet, don't leave it there in the first place.
* Stop talking to yourself out loud in Italian. Ditto for gasping really loudly at something you've seen on the Internet.
* Don't touch my leg when you're talking to me. I realise you're Mediterranean , and that maybe that's culturally acceptable to you, but bloody hell, I don't like other men touching me in the office.
* If you do want to talk to me, hovering behind me when I'm on the computer until I notice you really isn't the best way to respect people's privacy. I know it's open plan, but there's a difference between walking past someone's screen, and standing behind them. I may end up "accidentally" elbowing you if you keep this one up.
* When I say "yes, I understand", that is not a cue to explain another time. I fully understand that you talk slowly, and it must be difficult talking about technical topics in a different language, but when I say "that's fine", I don't mean waste another five minutes of my time.
* Meetings that are scheduled for twenty minutes long should not run an hour over time. srsly.
More may come tomorrow as they occur... 1.30am is not really the height of my rage, but I felt the need to make a systematic list.
New guy started about a month and a half ago now. Himself and myself are a team within the company, so we sit beside each other. He seems a really nice guy, but constantly irritates me in so many tiny ways...
* If your phone is vibrating, pick it up off the desk. Better yet, don't leave it there in the first place.
* Stop talking to yourself out loud in Italian. Ditto for gasping really loudly at something you've seen on the Internet.
* Don't touch my leg when you're talking to me. I realise you're Mediterranean , and that maybe that's culturally acceptable to you, but bloody hell, I don't like other men touching me in the office.
* If you do want to talk to me, hovering behind me when I'm on the computer until I notice you really isn't the best way to respect people's privacy. I know it's open plan, but there's a difference between walking past someone's screen, and standing behind them. I may end up "accidentally" elbowing you if you keep this one up.
* When I say "yes, I understand", that is not a cue to explain another time. I fully understand that you talk slowly, and it must be difficult talking about technical topics in a different language, but when I say "that's fine", I don't mean waste another five minutes of my time.
* Meetings that are scheduled for twenty minutes long should not run an hour over time. srsly.
More may come tomorrow as they occur... 1.30am is not really the height of my rage, but I felt the need to make a systematic list.
Wednesday, 14 January 2009
Sea Sew
Sew comes up as sex in the predictive text. heh. Beautiful album by Lisa Hannigan though, just beautiful.
I find myself listening to it when I can't sleep, which is a fairly frequent event these days, or rather, these nights. My brain switches to turbo without any outside stimulus, and mills through any number of thoughts, events, people. Usually I start imagining some scenario, and I follow that train of thought to the bitter end, leaving me sad or angry, or both, or just confused.
I'm a groomsman at a wedding next month, and the bride has informed me that my old girlfriend will be there, which raises multiple questions, and limitless potential scenarios. Will she bring a date? A friend? (I get on well with all of her friends bar one.) Will she be staying locally? In the same hotel? Will we hook up? Will she hook up with someone else? Do I want anything to happen at all? Will we be friendly, civil, or simply refuse to acknowledge each other's existence? Only a few weeks 'til I find out...
In the meantime, there's groomie drinks, the stag, a separate trip to Donegal, and much socialising to be done! And I have to get myself a really nice suit! I don't want to be left with an ugly cousin! :P
Tuesday, 30 December 2008
Resolutions
Meet a new girl. Move on from the old one, particularly her bosoms, as fantastic as they were.
Smarten up at the job. Read up, start making a more active contribution to everything, and know your shizzle.
Get a pair of runners, take up some kind of walking/running. Get more muscles than just your right arm.
Save a regular amount of money every month. Work out a budget that includes rent, and try to cut back expenditure on alcohol. It's horrendous really, how much I spend on drink. Of my non-capital recreational outgoings... it's probably 60-70%. Fark like.
Mostly, stop feeling sorry for yourself bitch. Take over as section leader of the cubs, get into the job, and get busy. Happiness comes later!
Man that's depressing.
Smarten up at the job. Read up, start making a more active contribution to everything, and know your shizzle.
Get a pair of runners, take up some kind of walking/running. Get more muscles than just your right arm.
Save a regular amount of money every month. Work out a budget that includes rent, and try to cut back expenditure on alcohol. It's horrendous really, how much I spend on drink. Of my non-capital recreational outgoings... it's probably 60-70%. Fark like.
Mostly, stop feeling sorry for yourself bitch. Take over as section leader of the cubs, get into the job, and get busy. Happiness comes later!
Man that's depressing.
Monday, 29 December 2008
Sunday, 28 December 2008
Mountains
I was going for a stroll today, organised by a friend. I brought a friend too, told her about the stroll, said there might be a few kids along. She dutifully dressed as appropriate.
Unfortunately, no kids showed up, just four adults and we walked about 21km along the Wicklow Way, through mud and across frozen puddles, and for far too long along the road, but we were short on options for getting home before dark. My apologies N, for not warning you sufficiently. :)
Unfortunately, no kids showed up, just four adults and we walked about 21km along the Wicklow Way, through mud and across frozen puddles, and for far too long along the road, but we were short on options for getting home before dark. My apologies N, for not warning you sufficiently. :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)